Oakland Psychotherapy & Online Counseling
Dating therapy
Finding a partner | Online dating| Self esteem | Relationship values | Dating burnout | Loneliness
Therapy for dating in the Bay Area
The majority of clients who seek therapy are single or have been struggling to find a partner.
Most clients tell me that dating sucks. Particularly online dating.
Most find that they are burned out from it. Many have had negative experiences and it doesn’t seem worth the effort.
If you’re feeling alone and tired of “going on the apps”, therapy might be a good next step to help you find clarity on what you want out of a relationship and how to achieve one.
We start with talking about what’s important to you. What' kind of person you want to be in this world. How you want to spend your time. Who you want to be as your best self.
Then, we focus on what values are important for you to have in a partner.
Counseling with me will allow you to make more focused and intentional choices when it comes to dating. We can explore obstacles you’ve encountered and discover new ways of interacting and engaging with a potential partner on dates to help you be successful.
Help with Online Dating
Online dating can be exhausting.
Scrolling endlessly through dating profiles can feel pointless and overwhelming.
Keeping up multiple surface-level conversations with people takes energy.
It feels like time is running out to find a partner.
The buildup before a first date doesn’t feel worth it if it goes poorly.
Getting ghosted is frustrating.
You thought the date went well, but the other person didn’t, and now you feel hopeless.
You have so many questions about “what went wrong” on your date.
In psychotherapy, these are common feelings people share about online dating. Our work together will help you gain a fresh perspective on what you want out of dating and relationships. We can problem-solve if there are any psychological blockers keeping you from finding your match.
Knowing who you are and what’s important to you in life through counseling can give you the endurance you need to keep up the search for a partner.
You will find a safe haven for venting about feeling isolated, left behind, and like there’s something “wrong with you” when you haven’t had the best of luck in dating. Finding validation in a psychotherapy setting about your anxiety and sadness can be healing and help you stay focused.
Book today with Chloe Demisch to get started finding your path in the challenging world of online dating.
How self esteem and confidence affect dating
Self doubt can get in the way of you being your true self. Being hard on yourself makes you lose confidence and momentum when it comes to dating.
Therapy can help you regain a strong sense of who you are so you can be confident.
If there are things you want to work on to be a better partner, we can discuss and improve these in our counseling sessions.
When you show up as your best self on dates, you’ve got nothing to lose.
Being genuine not only feels good, but is crucial to truly finding a good match. You don’t want someone falling in love with a version of you that’s not real.
Fear of rejection is real and a can be a huge obstacle in dating.
It can feel more comfortable and safe to keep your guard up when dating someone new so you can protect yourself.
Having emotional walls up might be keeping potential partners at a distance.
But your ability to be vulnerable will help you find a partner more easily and quickly. Chloe can help you learn how to do this.
We will work through the fears that are holding you back so you’re able to find a partner who is an authentic fit for you.
Relationship Values
Knowing what is important to you in life will help you find a good match.
Being your ideal self is the best way to connect with someone as you’re dating.
But if you’re not sure what your values are, Chloe can help.
We will do several exercises to help you understand what qualities you want to portray as a person in this world and how you want to behave with others.
Therapy can also help you identify qualities that are essential for you in a partner.
What do you want in an ideal partner? Talking through characteristics and behaviors that are important for your partner to have helps you not waste time with people you won’t mesh with.
Understanding how you want a partnership to feel and what things are important to you in relationships is a key component in dating therapy.
Dating Burnout
It’s a lot to put yourself out there repeatedly. Your heart on the line.
Only to be rejected.
Being vulnerable takes practice. It’s much easier to not let people in. That way you won’t get hurt.
Or so it seems…
However, the walls we keep up, also keep out potential partners because they’re not really seeing you.
Presenting a superficial version of yourself leads to missed connections.
Get help in therapy putting down your guard so you can find a true match.
It’s normal to want to take a break from dating, but I’ll help you understand why you are.
That way you can find true motivation to keep up the search, despite your fears, because you understand the purpose behind seeking true connections through dating.
Loneliness
If you’ve tried and tried again to find your match, it can make you feel very alone.
Especially if most of your friends are already in relationships.
You worry there’s something “wrong” with you. Or that it’s your destiny to be single.
Being lonely for a long time might lead you to assume romance isn’t in the cards for you.
But this defeatist attitude can work against you and close you off to potential partners.
Feeling depressed often leads to isolation. And vice versa.
Find support with Chloe Demisch, LCSW in getting back into the game even when you don’t really feel like it.
Chloe’s training in Motivational Interviewing may assist you in finding the motivation to take action in your love life.
Each week we will talk through obstacles that might be keeping you stuck and alone. Get started today with rebuilding your identity and ability to reach out to others for connection so you don’t have to feel lonely anymore.
Book today and receive a free 10-minute consultation